First Thoughts

Creativity has different stages. Here's the very first stage of my project. My project is to create the dialog of the daughters of Sabine that stopped a war. My first thoughts re in a very crude form. I did not think about grammar or the best way to say things. I simply wanted to get my ideas on paper and see what you think. Let me know!

Characters:
Daughter of Sabine
Father
Brother
Husband
Motherly figure to the daughter that comes out of no where to give advice. THIS IS WHERE THE IDEA COMES FROM

Lol this is kinda like beauty and the beast…

Do I want to do the whole story or maybe it should just start when she hears the men are preparing for war with her family. Yes. I think it’ll start with her internal thoughts about how she has adjusted and has grown to love her husband. Perhaps having a child was a huge influence. But either way, it has happened and she can’t live without him. Nor her family. Maybe she’s so caught up in her sorrow at a potential loss and heartache that she’s frantic. She cries in a barn. A Motherly figure to the daughter that comes out of no where to give advice. This is where the idea comes from. And then she starts knocking on doors and tells them to knock on doors too, creating a snowball effect. And then the picture. You have the two armies in their forms about to go into battle, anticipating death and blood. But then the daughters come running out with no form at all in between the two armies. Children in their arms and at their heels. In a loose and scattered v form. It surprises both sides. Some people run to confront their wives/daughters. Yelling ensues. Then this daughter that started this whole thing gives a big speech. Needs to involve:

Ethos: Ethos is appeal based on the character of the speaker. An ethos-driven document relies on the reputation of the author. (http://www.rpi.edu/dept/llc/webclass/web/project1/group4/index.html)

Pathos: (Wikipedia) Emotional appeal can be accomplished in a multitude of ways:
 by a metaphor or story telling, common as a hook,
 by a general passion in the delivery and an overall emotion and sympathies of the speech or writing as determined by the audience. The pathos of a speech or writing is only ultimately determined by the hearers.

Logos: the speech itself, in so far as it proves or seems to prove. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Logos#Aristotle.27s_rhetorical_logos)


That's what I have so far. What do you think? What did you like? Are there any gaps in the story? How do you think I could bring in the aspect of Pathos?